God, if you can hear me out alright...

(This post will be more personal. Sorry.)

I'm not immune to all the problems I try to solve. Never assume otherwise, or that I think otherwise.

Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. Those who learn from history...well, history never leaves you. I'm rather furious at my own inability to learn from my own mistakes, but is this out of my control?

May God grant me clarity.

Allow me to digress.

--Obama, more troops? What are you thinking? We cannot possibly win this war. We have to get out. This is not helping.

--The doctors say I've pretty much fully recovered from my wisdom teeth being removed, and I can play my sax again. Good thing, as I have district auditions in a week...yet I really don't care. I feel like I've wasted tons of my parents' money and time with me playing sax--I'm not going to major in it or play it professionally...I don't think so, anyway. I feel even worse telling my private teacher that I'm done taking lessons. He's made me a better player in every possible way. I honestly think that if I wanted to, I COULD be a music major. But I don't think it's my call...so seven years of lessons with three teachers = wasted.

--The instrumental remix of "Hello Seattle" on Owl City's album Ocean Eyes might be the best song I've heard all year (save maybe mewithoutYou's "The King Beetle on a Coconut Estate"). I might actually compile an Album of the Year list, except I only have four or five albums from this year. This is partly why I want to be a music journalist--to expose myself to all this undoubtedly great music that I've missed.

--I'm not entirely sure what the point of this post was. Oh well. Lyrics. Emery's "Inside Our Skin."

If God is good, then what are we?
There is no plant without a seed
When morning comes, will we believe
All that was lost can be retrieved?
You say you're good, then let me see.
A faith is dead without the deed.
How can we fail if we believe?
Let's be who we were meant to be.

We all feel real inside our skin
With selfish hearts that hide our sin
But no one really knows our deepest secrets
We will separate ourselves from everyone that we know
We can't allow a single doubt or weakness to show
And just one more day without the shame
And I can move on...

We say, we're so misunderstood,
(We will separate ourselves from everyone that we know)
but I know we don't do the things we should
(We can't allow a single doubt or weakness to show)
So long to what I thought I was
(And just one more day without the shame and I can move on)
I'll be happier, happier when I've given up.

Wisdom light my way into the dark
Your words, the melody that carries me
We can't make a change 'til we know who we are
What burns? The fire refining me
Wisdom light my way into the dark
The melody that carries me.